Everyone is talking about how COVID-19 is affecting couples and their relationships but is anyone wondering how the single men and women are doing? I'm honestly not sure. But let me tell you this, there have been good and bad days. I've started to notice more and more how many of my friends have an SOS and how I don't. I really try not to let it bother me.
Like for example, at church, I didn't notice I sat by myself until someone pointed it out. I didn't mind. Why? Because I didn't come to sit by my bestie, I came to spend time in my God's Word and His goodness. Having a community is a plus and one I cherish, but if it was just me, I'd still worship God. That's how it should be.
With this lockdown, I've noticed how my mood and feelings constantly shift concerning my relationship status. Meaning, yes, I'm single. I have been for over a year. I try not to let it bother me. Yes, I still have my bad days. I still have those lonely nights where I just want someone I know will pick up the phone. I have friends, but those friends have boyfriends to turn to or talk to. Sometimes I want that, too. I want someone who's on speed dial and I'm on theirs.
When I get like this... I have to remind myself that God is still writing my love story and that it is perfectly okay to be single. It is perfectly okay to feel like a crush is going nowhere, I mean literally dead in the water nowhere. It is okay to feel defeated. Just don't stay there. Grow and learn from it. Move forward as best you can and as slow as you need to. Be patient with yourself and your progress.
There is NO timeline. We put so much pressure on what part of our journey we are in and forget to be thankful for what we have. So am I okay, some days yes, other days no. I had one of those bad days this weekend and it took a good hour to pull me back. Why? Because it literally hurt so much that I just didn't know answers to something and I wanted to. But sometimes, we don't have to know everything. Sometimes we just have to learn how to move past something and pray it works out in the end. Wasting time on stressing over a "timeline" only creates worry that you are falling behind. But my dear readers, you are not falling behind, you are right where God wants you.
You can't rush God's plan for your life. So, it is okay to grow right where you are. You don't need to be where everyone else is, that isn't your journey. Stay true to yourself, and jealousy of others won't be as strong. All you need is God.
“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.” - Song of Solomon 8:6
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. - John 14:27
I promise this waiting season isn't for nothing. It isn't to make you miserable. I see it has an opportunity to walk closer with God and find myself. I encourage you to listen to Him closely and trust that His plan is good and right. Everything will work out when He wants it to and until then be patient with Him and yourself. Honestly, worrying never made life any better, so give your worries, struggles, and doubts about this topic to God. Everything is going to be okay.
A Single Gal