7 Months From Now
I'm so sorry it's been so long since I've written to you. But, I know you know I haven't forgotten about you. I just took my grief offline for a long time. SO much has happened in the last 3 and a half months.
The last time we talked I was upset about a situation - that certain situation has toned down and I'm a bit better. But I still wish you were here to help me through all of it. I know God needed you more.
Something good did happen later that month - almost 3 months ago now. You would have been so thrilled, so excited. You were included in our big day as if you were still here in person with us. On July 30th, Dustin and I stood next to your gravestone on a very hot summer day - one of the hottest. He dropped to one knee and asked me to marry him. He wanted you there just as much as I did. He only knew you for 7 months, but he loved you almost as much as me. God knew I'd knew him to get me through losing you, my other half. He gave me someone to keep me going, keep me safe, and to love me. I promise no one can or ever will replace you Nanny, but we will always keep you in our memory. You are everywhere. I am so glad you were a part of our day. I know in 7 months...you'll be watching us get married from the best seat, Heaven. I hope you know that you aren't forgotten. That I am going to honor you every day in some way big or small. Like that day, you are always with us.
Thank you for teaching me how to take care of myself, and remember to make time for myself. Thank you for loving me.
I miss our phone calls. I miss our late-night bologna sandwiches. I miss our Cracker Barrel or Longhorn or Shef's Kitchen or Logan's days. I miss us gossiping on the back porch. I miss watching Lifetime movies in the bedroom. I miss randomly coming in the house to hear old country on the radio. I miss walking in and you are snacking or eating a full second meal. I miss bugging PawPaw with our loud talking.
Most importantly, I miss you.
I'll love you forever, my sweet angel.
Until Next Time,