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Forever 79

Dear Nanny,

Happy {first} Heavenly Birthday!

You almost made it to 80. Even though you are forever 79, you still lived 80 wonderful, hard, and beautiful years on this Earth. I am so blessed that I got you for 25 years. No matter what I was doing or going through you were always the first one I went to or the first one by my side. I don't know where our bond started, but I am so glad I got to be one of the people you were close to. I am so honored to have a million memories with you even the fights mixed in with them. Boy, did we disagree. People think we didn't, but just ask my momma, I came home mad sometimes mostly because I knew you were right and other times because I didn't like how the conversation went. That was us in a nutshell -the hit-or-miss advice sessions. Yet, nothing could have stopped me from telling you everything, because even in death I still tell you all the things. These last two months have been...hard.

Two months ago, I heard your voice for the last time, I believe. You couldn't speak the last two days, but you could squeeze my hand. Momma said that was you saying you love me. I know you do and still do. You are my sweet angel. Gone but not forgotten.

I wish you were here to help me make my book sparkle like you were three years ago with my debut book. I need your book-loving self, even if I had to read the pages to you, I need your help. It's not that I don't like everyone's help, but I need yours. You were my first reader, the one that kept saying you couldn't wait to read my finished book. On your last day, I told you and Momma how Lucy's story continued in this book. I'm not sure you understood it all because you were fading fast, but I know you appreciated hearing it. I'm so glad I got to tell you. I wish I could tell you more. Because it is all a bit stressful.

I know you aren't hurting anymore. You are smiling all the time. I miss you. I love you.

Until Next Time,


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