It's November. The month of Jake and Momma's birthdays (and many other family birthdays, goodness), and most importantly Thanksgiving. This year is going to be hard.
You won't be sitting at the dining room table ready to eat, smiling at me because you are about to eat too much. You won't walk through the door with some creation you cooked up. You won't be squeezing me tight and commenting on my outfit. You won't be riding over with PawPaw to come to join us all.
There will be a missing spot this year...as there will be for years to come.
I pray for people to understand that PawPaw is only strong for all of us and that he misses you something fierce. That the 25th and 28th of every month since you passed has been hard on all of us, especially him. So if no one else understands, I understand why he doesn't want to be around anyone on those days. I wish the next two major holidays didn't fall on those numbers, but that can't be helped.
I pray for you to give us strength those days, Nanny. I pray for you to give PawPaw the most. I pray that people are easy on him this year and years to come. Because for most of his life, he's had you by his side for holidays and this year is going to be hard. I may not understand it completely, but I know enough not to push him. He deserves love and respect in all of this while he is griefing you - we all do.
I'll eat enough for you, Nanny. On Christmas, I'll ask to open the presents a hundred times just like you did. Because you deserved more time. But I know, your body and soul needed healing and this Earth couldn't do that. Now as you watch over us, I hope you know you are always in our thoughts - you will never leave my heart.
I love and miss you, my sweet angel.
Until Next Time,